


Past Tense

by next12exits



Category: Doctor Who (2005)
Genre: Cyber Doctor (mentioned), F/M, Porridge (mentioned), Pure Whouffle Fluff, River Song (mentioned), Romance, whouffle
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-05-26
Updated: 2013-05-26
Packaged: 2017-12-13 01:03:22
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,462
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/818122
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/next12exits/pseuds/next12exits
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>On a gloomy winter's day, The Doctor and Clara talk about River in the past tense, and love in the present tense ...</p>
            </blockquote>





	Past Tense

**Author's Note:**

> Ok, so I'm new to the Whovian Fandom, so I imagine there will be parts of this story that aren't cannon. I apologise in advance for that!  
> This is an Un-Beta'ed one shot between the Doctor and Clara, set after "The Name of the Doctor", so I'm sorry if it's grammatically difficult to understand. I'm posting it now because chances are that in six months, this will be completely blown out of the water. Nonetheless, here is some pure Whouffle fluff to tie Clara/Eleven shippers over until November. Hope it's OK! :)

It was a dull and wintery afternoon in London. The icy wind blew steadily down the streets that were full of people bustling around the city; their jackets pulled in tight around them in hands that were chilled to the bone, despite being clad in gloves, with displeasure written upon their faces.

Inside Clara's apartment, it wasn't much better. The heater was blowing arctic air around the living room, and the floorboards were cold underfoot. Clara shivered as she waited impatiently for the kettle to boil, while watching The Doctor potter around the living room, tutting  and muttering under his breath.  
  
"How do you people live like this!" he exclaimed.  
  
"Oh, come on. It's not that bad!"  
  
"Really? Your fingertips are turning purple," The Doctor observed, inclining his head towards Clara's hands.  
  
Clara glanced quickly at her hands an raised her eyebrows in surprise, before shrugging.  
  
"Huh. So they are. Well spotted!"  
  
He shook his head and whipped out his sonic screwdriver, waving it in around front of the heater. It whirred and buzzed before warm air started streaming out through the vents, suddenly taking the chill off the air.  
  
"Ooh, good job. Love your work, Doctor!" She teased, as the Doctor rolled his eyes in mock-exasperation.  
  
The kettle whistled, and Clara wandered back into the kitchen still grinning and brewed a large pot of tea. As the water swirled around inside the tea pot, she could hear The Doctor resume his muttering about "the ridiculous life of humans".  
  
"We can go anywhere in the world Clara, _literally_ , and yet you choose to stay here on Earth. A planet with global warming, and electronic devices that never seem to work, and odd looking attire. Honestly, it's far more pleasant this time of year when you're in a more tropical climate, you know."  
  
"True," Clara said while pouring the tea into two mugs, "But I really like winter. You know, I forget how alien you are, until you go and say something like that."  
  
"Proof that you've been around me for far too long," The Doctor quipped.  
  
Grinning, Clara passed him a mug of tea and they sat down next to each other on the small couch. They had spent a great deal of time together recently, and despite everything she had learned in the past few weeks, Clara still found herself falling in love with The Doctor more and more each day. It was hard not to - the way he smiled at her when he was on the verge of revealing exciting information, or the way he danced lithely and joyously around the TARDIS. Their playful banter was one of the first things she had fallen in love with about The Doctor, and she was amazed by the way his brain worked and how easily they fell into conversation.  
  
But Clara had also fallen in love with The Doctor's softer, more vulnerable side. Perhaps it was because it was the most human thing about him that she could relate to, or perhaps it was simply because it was such a rare thing for him to show to her. The Doctor was a force of nature, and she was drawn to him almost magnetically.  
  
Clara had lost track of the number of time she'd chided herself for letting her feelings for him come to surface, especially since her recent meeting with River. She replayed all the words The Doctor and River had said to her about their relationship in her mind so many times, that her head was full on unanswered questions. Part of her felt as though it was none of her business, but Clara had always been a curious person, and there was something about The Doctor and River's relationship that seemed somewhat unorthodox.  
   
Clara remembered with perfect clarity how The Doctors skin felt underneath her finger tips as she asked River whether sacrificing herself would be enough to save him. The sadness in River's voice seemed to pity Clara's decision, and both Clara and River suddenly understood each other's feelings about the alien man that stood between them. It was in that moment that Clara truly understood the depths of her feelings towards The Doctor, however she had pushed them to the back of her mind, and jumped into The Doctor's time stream. In seconds, her own time stream had been torn to shreds, and she had wandered around the Doctor's labyrinth; lost, alone and miserable.  
   
What followed that was a series of fragmented realities, and memories that Clara had trouble deciphering. The only thing she cared to remember was the sound of The Doctor's voicebegging her to come towards him, and the feeling of his skin against hers; his hearts beating against her chest as he held her close, saying repeatedly "Clara … Oh, my Clara." The tone of his voice as he said those words echoed around her head for hours afterwards.  
  
Yes … She was his Clara, and had always wanted to be, in whatever form she could. Was she a copy like RIver too now? God knows she'd lived many different lives, and fallen in love with The Doctor every single time.  
  
Clara sipped at her tea absently, still completely immersed in her own thoughts until The Doctors' hand appeared in front of her eyes, clicking impatiently until she shook herself back into the moment.  
  
"Oi! Is there a Clara inside that human shell, or have I been talking to a statue for the past five minutes?"  
  
"Sorry," Clara smiled apologetically, "I was just thinking about someone."  
  
"Oh, that special man that caught your eye on our last adventure? Yes, yes. I saw the way you and "Porridge" made eyes at each other! Honestly though, the man wasn't right for you Clara, and I think you made the right decision!"  
  
Clara chuckled and blushed slightly, rolling her eyes at The Doctor before sipping at her tea again.  
  
"Actually, I was thinking about River."  
  
The Doctor tensed slightly, his smile faltering as he stirred another sugar into his tea.  
  
"Yes. She tends to play on people's minds a lot after they meet her."  
  
They sipped their tea in silence for a few moments, while Clara debated whether to push the topic further. She knew that The Doctor's relationship with River was absolutely none of her business, but Clara was curious about it nonetheless. Throwing caution to the wind, she cleared her throat and spoke.  
  
"Why did you say she was an Ex?" Clara asked casually.  
  
The Doctor ran a hand through his hair, before shrugging and sighing quietly.  
  
"Because she was," he replied simply.  
  
"Past tense?" Clara enquired.  
  
The Doctor's clear blue eyes pierced through Clara's as she met his eyes with her own. She studied his face, trying to decipher the mix of emotions that played out across it. After a few moments, he responded.    
  
"Yes. Past tense."  
  
Clara nodded and sipped at her tea, clasping the warm mug between her cold hands.  
  
"Clara," The Doctor said slowly, putting his tea down on the table, "Do you believe in the human theory that "there's someone for everyone" when it comes to love?"  
  
Clara looked up at him from over her mug and raised her eyebrows in surprise. It was an odd question for The Doctor to ask, yet Clara knew he never asked these questions simply for the sake of it. There was always a point he was trying to make, or something he was trying to say - Clara just had to figure out what it was ...  
  
"Of course I do," she replied without hesitating, "I mean, it seems like bit a bit of a long shot sometimes, but I do believe in it. That being said, it doesn't necessarily mean that the person you're supposed to end up with can actually be with you."  
  
The Doctor looked puzzled.  
  
"Meaning?" he prompted.  
  
"Meaning that the person you're designed for could potentially be better designed for someone else. Or, they could live in a different part of the world, so you'd never end up meeting them. Which, I guess means that you _**are**_ meant for someone, however you still end up being single and alone when you're eighty years old anyway."  
  
The Doctor chuckled and crossed his arms over his chest, leaning back into the couch.  
  
"Spoken like a true cynic," he grinned.  
  
"I'm not being cynical, I'm being realistic" Clara replied, shrugging but smiling back at him.  
  
"Well, let's look at it a different way," The Doctor said, "What if, rather than being designed for one person for the entire duration of your life, you're designed for many people?"  
  
"How does that differ from what I just said?" Clara argued playfully, "Statistically, you're probably compatible with hundreds of people all over the world. But if you never meet them  .."  
  
"Ah," The Doctor interrupted, "Yes. But what if you do? What if you **_do_** actually meet all of those people you're compatible with?"  
  
Clara looked at him, at a loss for what to say in reply.  
  
"Then … I suppose you'd have to choose someone to be with, and hope that you've made the right choice. Right?"  
  
The Doctor rested his chin on his hands, and surveyed the expression on Clara's face. Her hair cascaded over her shoulders as she sipped at her tea again, though her eyes were distant, clearly lost in though. It wasn't like Clara to be so obvious with her emotions. Despite the fact that she had a kind and loving heart, Clara still kept her guard up to prevent herself from getting hurt or attached to too many different people. That was the trouble with time travel, The Doctor thought, meeting all kinds of amazing people and having to simply leave them behind. Most of the time, anyway ...  
  
"You're thinking about her again, aren't you?"  
  
"Hmm?" Clara responded, shaking herself out of her reverie. "Who?"  
  
"River," The Doctor said softly.  
  
Not meeting his eyes, Clara nodded and began smoothing out non existent wrinkles on her dress. She didn't want to admit to herself why The Doctor's relationship with River bothered her so much. She had met River, and thought quite highly of her - she was quick witted, playful and incredibly sexy in her own way. But mostly, River was strong mentally and emotionally. She would have to be in order to be married to a Time Lord. Finding out that information had stung ...  
  
"It's hard not to," she confessed, "River is a force of nature. You both are."  
  
The Doctor chuckled and fiddling with his hands, the way he always did when the topic of conversation was as delicate as this.  
  
"Yes. She was. But again, past tense."  
  
The slightest hint of hope flashed across Clara's eyes.  
  
"So you don't think --"  
  
"No." The Doctor cut her off. "I know what you're going to ask, Clara, and no. River was a copy that lived on for far longer than she should have. We made our peace, and we said our final goodbyes. Every story has an ending."  
  
Clara forced a smile across her face.  
  
"I thought you didn't like endings?"  
  
"Not in the slightest," The Doctor smiled, "But you know the old saying; when one door closes, another one opens. Funnily enough, it just so happens to be true. And you know, I've learned something too. I've learned that … Well ..."  
  
He trailed off, and Clara looked at him quizzically. She noticed The Doctor's cheeks had coloured slightly, and he was playing with his jacket somewhat nervously.  
  
"Go on," Clara prompted, putting her mug down on the table in order to give him her complete and undivided attention.  
  
He cleared his throat and looked at her with a look on his face that equal parts amusement, and resignation, with a side of awkwardness to boot.  
  
"You're going to make me say it, aren't you?"  
  
"Say what?" Clara asked, though she had a fairly good idea of what the next words out of his mouth were going to be. She felt her pulse quicken, and mentally forced herself to take a few deep breaths. This was The Doctor, after all. His conversations never went in the direction she expected them to.  
  
"Oh, all right then!" He said in exasperation, "I've also learned that it's possible to love more than one person at a time. It doesn't diminish the value of either relationship - it rather enhances them I believe. I have two hearts. Most of the time they want the same person. But sometimes, they want one person each. River and … Well. You, Clara."  
  
"Me?" Clara asked, both shocked and elated. "But that's …"  
  
"Impossible, yes," he said, smiling gently at her, "But you're my impossible girl, Clara. I'd never expect anything to be straight forward with you, and frankly, I wouldn't have it any other way."  
  
Clara stared at him suspiciously for a few moments before letting out a hoot of laughter and shaking her head in disbelief.  
  
"Yeah, yeah. Very funny, Doctor. That's a good joke!"  
  
The Doctor rolled his eyes in exasperation.  
  
"Honestly, woman, you make everything so unnecessarily difficult."  
  
And in that moment, he pulled Clara towards him, and kissed her firmly on the mouth. Clara's eyes widened in shock, and it took her a few seconds to understand what was finally happening. The Doctor's hands cupped Clara's face as he deepened the kiss, which thankfully she had recovered enough to respond to.  
  
Her fingers wove their way through his hair, before trailing down the back of his neck and resting on his shoulders. She could feel the thrum of his hearts beating a tattoo against her chest and she lost herself in the dizziness of The Doctor's kiss. After a few moments, they broke apart; The Doctor resting his forehead against Clara's, smiling broadly. After a few moments, Clara spoke, still slightly breathless.  
  
"Hey, this is the real Doctor right? I wasn't just kissing the creepy Cyber-Doctor from Hedgewick's World of Wonders, was I?"  
  
The Doctor opened his mouth in mock-offence.  
  
"Great, so now when I kiss you you're automatically going to assume that it's someone, or _**something**_   impersonating me. Excellent start to our relationship, Clara!"  
  
"How am I to know it's really you?" she argued playfully.  
  
The Doctor grinned and drew Clara closer to him again until their faces were were inches apart.  
  
"Well," he said against her lips, "You'll just have to keep kissing me so you know, without a doubt, how the real Doctor kisses. I've been told that it's quite hard to forget."  
  
Clara grinned, and pressed her lips against The Doctor's, losing herself in his kiss once again. The Doctor was right … She'd just have to keep kissing him until she knew every single thing about those lips. Somehow she didn't think it was going to be a tedious task ...


End file.
